Unfortunately Kim Kardashian Has Nowhere to Wear This Baffling Outfit

Sometimes, while you ride out isolation, it is fun to play dress-up. Just cook up a spicy little fit and try it on for whoever happens to be around, whether that is an actual human being or your poor obliging pet. This can help create a sense of normalcy: First, I put on the going-out top, then I hit the dance floor, which (conveniently) in the middle of my bedroom floor. First, I put on a pile of necklaces, then I attend the Zoom happy hour, ugh. Or, perhaps: First, I put on the assless chaps, then I go stand by the car.

All dressed up with nowhere to go pic.twitter.com/YFxUb2Bmmh

— Kim Kardashian West (@KimKardashian) May 20, 2020

Well, okay, I, too, would have to draw the line at the chaps scenario, simply because I own neither butt-baring pants nor a car. But Kim Kardashian West has both! So, in the spirit of preserving a shadow of her pre-pandemic life, she got “all dressed up with nowhere to go” on Wednesday, per her Twitter account. For Kim K, this meant long peroxide waves (where are we getting extensions in quarantine, hmm?); small, black space-invader sunglasses; a white bikini; and the crown jewel of her quarfit, a pair of off-white chaps. To borrow a favorite phrase of Kim’s: all-white everything … well not everything!

Incidentally, wherever that place is, it’s a place I would like to visit just once before I die. Regardless, now is as good a time as any to wear your leather chaps. And just over there, by your blindingly shiny silver vehicle? In terms of places to “go,” I think that makes as much sense as anywhere else, quarantine or no.